December's Illusion

This is pretty much a copy of the emails I have written to place after place seeking help for my dog Maggie.

I have written this letter so many times that I should know it by heart – I have sent it out to so many places seeking help, but I don’t even get the courtesy of an email informing me that they can’t help.

My dog Maggie is one of the nicest dogs that you will ever meet. Maggie has been with us for almost 10 years. We got her from an animal shelter when we lived in Nebraska and I can honestly say without too much prejudice that she is THE best dog ever. Her temperament has always been sweet and gentle, she is kind and loving and not only a great companion and joy to me, but also a great dog with my grandchildren, who all love her to pieces.

Five years ago, Maggie began getting fatty tumors as her breed (German Short Hair/Chocolate Lab mix) tend to get, there was one in particular that we had looked at by her vet, and it was diagnosed as a simple non-malignant fatty tumor and we were told not to worry about it unless it got bothersome for her. A year ago the tumor started to grow bigger, and in the past three months it has really grown to an enormous size and has been rubbing on her leg while she walks, causing the skin on the tumor to break open in little sores.

We have talked to several veterinarian offices, but unfortunately most want in excess of $1500 – $3000.00 to do the operation to remove this cyst. In 2006 my husband Tom was injured at work and lost his job, six weeks later I was hit by a drunk driver and lost my job, while we are both actively searching constantly for jobs, we are struggling to make ends meet and our credit has suffered – we cannot afford this amount of money to get Maggie the surgery she needs. Most offices want payment in full or offer a credit application – and since we can’t pay in full and our credit has suffered, this isn’t an option for us either.

In the past two months I have emailed the University Of Minnesota Vet School and received no response, so I called them and was informed what I already knew – there was no help there for Maggie. I’ve called a countless list of other Vet offices and found the same to be true everywhere – pay in full or credit. I’ve called a dozen or more Pet agencies trying to find help, there was only one place that called me back – and even that one place doesn’t seem to be able to help. I’ve called the places they suggested, but only one of them could have let us make payments, but said that with a tumor of that size, they wouldn’t be able to do it because they don’t have the necessary equipment to handle such an operation.

I’ve written emails to all the local news stations and newspapers and have received not one reply, not even a courtesy “we got your email but sorry we can’t help” reply. I am devastated.

Maggie’s tumor continues to grow and is now beginning to affect the way she walks and moves and continues to break open little sores and my husband told me this morning that if we cannot find any help for her soon, we are going to have to seriously think about putting her down. I asked if he was serious, and he replied that he was, that it would be the kindest thing we could do for her so she doesn’t suffer. In my heart I know he is right, but it doesn’t help my heart from breaking. You see, Maggie is my first dog, ever. Most of you had dogs when you were kids, I never did. Our family had a dog, but my mom always got rid of them for some reason or another before I had a chance to attach to them, and then when I was 14 I was bit by a dog and had to have rabies shots across my stomach so until I was 37, I had quite literally sworn off dogs out of fear until I met Maggie the day the local animal shelter held an adoption day at the place I worked and Maggie and I locked eyes. I had to call my husband to come purchase her before someone else saw in her what I saw in her. She has been my baby ever since.

How do you look into those big brown eyes with the most beautiful long eyelashes I have ever seen on a dog and say a final goodbye to the one who has been your very best friend for the past 10 years? My eyes well up with unshed tears just thinking about it. I know that in very very near future, I am going to have to put her down and cut her life short because I can’t afford this operation she so desperately needs. Its only a matter of weeks now.